Business Networking is NOT All About You
I can spot a business networking shark from across a crowded room.
He confindently strides up to you with his business card in hand and says “Hello. I'm Douche Bag. So nice to meet you. I help people with *insert crap evelvator pitch here that goes on far too long.*” Grabs your business card and scurries away.
Then the calls begin. Mr. Bag calling you to sell his service.
UGH! I hate that guy. Don't you?
He clearly has missed the point of networking.
Networking is NOT all about you!
Recently, I've been doing a lot of business networking. I actually enjoy a lot of the structured networking events. I love meeting people and chatting with them about their dreams, goals and where they want to take their business.
To me the most wonderfabulous thing about business networking is NOT generating leads.
It's NOT finding a new client.
It's NOT having an opportunity to promote my business.
It's being able to help at least one other person.
I was at a business networking event and chatted with a lovely woman. We talked about her current business. She casually mentioned that the other business that she wanted to start would take at least five years. I was curious about her other business. She told me casually that her goal was to help ranchers get their grass-fed beef to consumers. Very cool! Even cooler, I have a friend who helps small producers do that exact thing. I set them up.
Being able to do this was a HUGE rush for me. I felt helpful.
How can I help you?
When I walk into a business networking event, I typically have zero expectations. I'm just there to meet people.
I do have one goal: To genuinely connect with one person and try to help them.
I believe in business networking karma. If I do my best to help other, it will come back to me.
Do you have a networking success story to share? How have you connected other people? Let me know!
When I saw this post, I just about fell on the floor, because I was teaching exactly that to my students just last night. It’s been on my mind because we have a local women’s networking group here, which I just joined. Truly, I have been floored at how self-focused the group is – not the members, but the format. It’s the tried-and-true format of “let’s all stand up and tell each other what we do” followed by a presentation. It feels stale. I want to scream, why don’t we find out what we all need and match up by who can help us today??? Surely, newbies would like some help getting clients and experienced business owners would need help with stress and organization and expansion issues. The whole thing is just falling a bit flat to me, because by the time you get to meet people, you have to move on to the next stage of the meeting. Whew – bigger vent in me than I expected. 🙂 Loved your post.
I totally understand that Jennifer Michelle! I was talking to a woman I met at a networking group who exemplifies the giving mindset of “How can I help you” and we were chatting about the different types of networking. She felt that 90% of people at some types of networking events were just there for themselves. Trying to sell other services. While some of the formal groups like BNI had a much higher percentage of a giving mindset. Networking is suppose to be about HELPING not getting! It’s important to keep that in mind, and I think a lot of people forget about it.
I was at a BNI event featuring Dr. Ivan Misner, the founder of BNI; he asked, “How many of you go to a networking event hoping that someone will buy something from you?” You could feel the tension as a roomful of knowing hands tried not to float above their heads. So he followed up with the question, “How many of you go to a networking event looking to buy something?”
In all sincerity, nobody goes to a networking event out of altruism. We all go with different ideas, but our ultimate goal is to benefit our business or practice.
Keeping that in mind, I have begun to look at networking events like speed-dating – not for the quick sale, but to find people with a similar “giving” mindset that I can develop a long-term mutually-beneficial relationship with.
Maybe we can rework the old phrase into something like, “Teach a (wo)man to close a sale at a networking event, and s/he will eat for a day. Teach them to build lasting relationships and they’ll eat for a lifetime!”
Yes Mack exactly!! I understand that going to networking, we all are hoping for a payoff at some point. Like you said, it’s about building relationships. I figure if I can help one person, I am putting a quarter into the karma bowl and eventually that will pay-off. I do like the rush I get from helping someone out.
I am totally stealing this (although I would tell the world it came from you): “Teach a (wo)man to close a sale at a networking event, and s/he will eat for a day. Teach them to build lasting relationships and they’ll eat for a lifetime!”
Dead-on. I can even smell the saltwater of these douchebag sharks. As a salesperson, it’s not about you and how wonderful you are; it’s what you can do for your customer or client. Some people just don’t get it!
Exactly. You have to put yourself out of your mind, but have to meet other people’s needs. They might not need you, but they might need someone you know!!