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12 Most Down-to-Earth Ways to Build Relationships Through Public Speaking

Build Relationships Through Public SpeakinWhat is the best way to find new clients, network and build new relationships?

Public speaking. I once told a colleague this and she looked at me as if I was insane. She asked, “Build relationships? How can that be? There are so many people in the audience. How is that possible?”

Building relationships is not about selling the audience a product or service, but showing that you, the speaker, have the audience’s best interest in mind and you want them to succeed. Here are 12 most effective ways to build connections using public speaking that will build your business and your network.

1. Be yourself

The best way to build a trusting relationship with the audience is to simply be you. Let your own unique personality, style and sense of humor shine through. People can spot a fake a mile away — if you are trying to be someone you are not (or emulating another speaker), the audience knows and they will shut down.

2. It’s not about you

Speaking is never about the speaker. It’s about the audience. Worrying about how you sound or if you are making a fool out of yourself places yourself above the audience. Focusing on the audience alleviates nerves and allows speakers to connect to the people they are trying to reach.

3. Answer “what’s in it for me?”

Putting the audience first in the relationship means answering the all-important question “What’s in it for me?” Why should these people be listening to this presentation? What can they expect to learn from it? How will it help their business or their life? Telling the audience within the first two minutes of a presentation what they can expect to get shows that the speaker has the audience’s best interest in my mind.

4. Be passionate

Enthusiasm is contagious. If you are passionate about your topic, the audience will see how much you care and that you truly believe that they can benefit from your message. If you show your passion, the audience will be passionate and walk away from your presentation energized and wanting more.

5. Tell stories

Stories are powerful tools for emotional connection. A good story makes the speaker relatable. The audience can see themselves in a story. Personal stories build relationships because it allows the audience to get to know to the presenter.

6. Use charts sparingly

Avoid death by bar chart! Numbers can be powerful but too many bar charts can put the audience to sleep. Ask yourself — do I need this whole chart or do just a few numbers tell my story? Make the numbers relevant to the audience by explaining numbers in a way the audience can understand.

7. Don’t let PowerPoint distract the audience

PowerPoint presentations should never be a substitute for the speaker. If the audience can read your entire presentation from the slides, they don’t need you. They don’t need a relationship with you. Don’t let PowerPoint be a substitute for YOU!

8. Be prepared by practicing

Have you ever seen a presenter who stumbled their way through a presentation or read their entire speech? Did you pay attention or check out Facebook instead? Nothing says I don’t care about my audience like not practicing. Practicing a presentation shows that the speaker values the audience time and wants them to benefit from the message.

9. Don’t be perfect

There is a myth that you have to be perfect in order to be a good speaker. No stumbles or “umm’s”. Being too polished of a speaker makes you seem slick and inauthentic. Mistakes are natural and not at all a big deal to the audience. Mistakes make us human and relatable in the eyes of an audience.

10. You don’t need to know everything

Related to the myth of perfection, a speaker does not have to know everything about their topic. Get a question that you can’t answer; simply admit that you don’t know. Tell the questioner that you will find out the answer and get back to them. Never make up an answer if you don’t know. It will drive a wedge in the relationship that you are trying to cultivate with the audience.

11. Match the energy of the audience

Have you ever been to a presentation or meeting directly after lunch? Everyone seems sleepy, digesting food and the energy is rather low. A speaker that is high energy is rather jarring to the post-lunch crowd. Meet your audience where they are in the moment then slowly bringing their energy level up to match your own enthusiasm for the topic.

12. Interact with the audience

Get the audience involved in your presentation by asking them questions. It’s a great way for you to get to know them while speaking. At the end of a presentation ask them to turn to a partner and say what their biggest takeaway is from the presentation. Ask them to share it with you. It’s invaluable feedback to you as a speaker and allows you to get to know those faces who have been giving you their time.

Go out and present! Take advantage of the speaking opportunities that come your way as they help you build relationship and your business.

Have you ever successfully built relationships by presenting? What are your tips?

Republished with permission, courtesy of 12 Most.

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6 responses to “12 Most Down-to-Earth Ways to Build Relationships Through Public Speaking”

  1. Donn King says:

    Great practical list, Michelle! I will use in class to emphasize some advice–it helps when they see someone else say what the silly old teacher tells them. 🙂

    To expand on number 12 a bit: I advise clients and students to either already know the answer to a question they will pose to an audience OR be prepared (plan A, plan B, plan C) for whatever the audience members answer. If you assume you know the answer and only prepare for it, a different answer can sink you. The particular question you suggest, though, is a no-lose one!

    • Michelle says:

      Craig Valentine once suggested that you have to expected the unexpected when interacting with the audience. The more you give a speech and hear a variety of different answers, the more prepared you can be. However, audiences are creative – so it’s a risk – you never know what they might say. Whatever that is – it’s important to respond to the answer with enthusiasm and even humor.

  2. Scott Danielson says:

    Excellent list as always.

    To expand on #9, I would say speakers should expect a couple mistakes in their presentations. Strangely this can actually calm your nerves since you’re no longer concerned about being “perfect”.

    • Michelle says:

      The myth of perfection can really unnerve speakers. You are so right. An audience expects an umm or two. Maybe a flub of words – it’s not the end of the world. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves and really it’s not about us. It just about connecting with the audience!

  3. Fear of Public Speaking says:

    Some fantastic tips. To talk around #12 Interact with the audience – this is an essential tip for being able to speak in public.

  4. Petar @ TalkBook says:

    The most important, often overlooked principle of public speaking is to build the relationships. The first four tips are the underlying concepts of the “Why?” part of public speaking. As I found for myself, without the clear Why part, it is almost impossible to be authentic. Thanks for sharing!

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